Thursday, March 19, 2009

Aaaahhstralia...

I have blogged about my deep and lasting love of one Hugh Jackman. Maybe it's those long legs, that were clearly designed to be in a showgirls style kick line, maybe it's the singing, maybe it's his 'do as Wolverine. Maybe it's that he gave Barbara Walters a lapdance. Whatever it is, Hugh has got it.

I may have metioned that Andrew feels similarly about Nicole Kidman. Ok, so we missed the proverbial boat on seeing Australia in the movie theaters, but we got it as soon as it was available on Netflix.

The movie was panned, but movie reviewers and I often don't see eye to eye, so I disregarded that bit of information, and we popped in the DVD. Beautiful scenery, beautiful people, but alas, that famous Baz Luhrmann cinemetography, which had the exact effect of making the movie feel cheesey. It's also narrated by the "mixed blood" child in the movie, in what feels like a HORRIFIC stereotype - as far as how he speaks.

Forget that. Remember, Hugh Jackman, Nicole Kidman. Beefcake and cheescake, respectively.

The reason you'll rent this movie, and enjoy it, is this, the best scene in the movie. Maybe the best scene in cinematic history:



Mmm... Creases. Also, note the VERY natural "dumping a bucket of water over my body" pose. (I've asked Andrew to re-enact this scene for me. I'll keep you posted on his answer.)

In any case, if you're looking for a great movie, rent something else. If you're looking for your fill of Jackman flesh, rent Australia.

While I have an undying love of Baz Luhrmann for bringing back the musical, (Baz, if you're reading this, I think I'd be a GREAT leading lady), this was a film that needed an editor. Or some velociraptors. (The raptors fight the Japanese invaders in my version, and they're not REALLY in Australia, the island they send the mixed race kids is really Isla Nublar. Totally plausible.)

It also could have used some Watchmen-style nudity, if you get my meaning. Also, does Patrick Wilson have a requisite nudity clause in his rider? Not that I'm complaining, I'm just curious.

So in short, the film was short on plot but high on eyecandy. In the eternal words of Gershwin: Who could ask for anything more?

6 comments:

  1. I think there's probably a whole sector of the movie industry devoted to making films that have no redeeming quality other than their eye candy. Not that I'm complaining, mind you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Patrick Wilson didn't get naked in Phantom. Then again, it's kind of hard to work a nude scene into Andrew Lloyd Webber, so perhaps my boyfriend, Patrick Wilson, made an exception in this case.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey whoa, what? Patrick Wilson and Hugh Jackman in the same movie? Numminess...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Eye candy is good....

    MMMMMMM.....

    Of course, I prefer the Jackman variety of eye candy....you know, rugged, accented and well, sweet.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I strongly recommend the brainless romantic comedy "Someone Like You" - Hugh at his hunky best paired with an Ashley Judd who they manage to make look awful in the same scene. Full of brain candy!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks for the comment about the my rain boots, may I return the compliment on your most awesome choice of video clips. Going to netflix that movie asap!

    ReplyDelete

If you'd like me to respond, please make sure to put your email address in the field. :)