Last night I dreamt that I was in graduate school, getting some sort of advanced degree in English Lit. I was attending grad school at my high school and I couldn't remember my locker combination. I came home and gave birth after school.
Now, before everyone gets all excited because they think I'm prego, hold your horses. I'm not.
It was wierd because I gave birth, and then my STOMACH hurt, instead of my bits.
In other bits of offensive news, I checked my MySpace this morning and there was a message and friend request from a guy named William. I usually check their pages, and I don't add people who I don't know personally, but sometimes people I know have wierd pictures up as their little avatar thing. So I click "see my other pictures" and there are like 5 pictures of his penis. What exactly is this prince of a man seeking on MySpace? Sex with women who are willing to give it away.
Now, this definition is CLEARLY what I look for on MySpace (definitely not to reconnect with people I've lost contact with, no), but to add insult to injury, PenisPictureMan's message to me said that my smile lit up his room and he was hoping to get to know me better. He's in his 40's, which isn't a deal breaker for me (since I like older men), but is since I'm married (pesky husband) and how I'm not going to have free sex with men who post pictures of their penises on the internet.
It's one thing to sneak a picture of your boyfriend/lover/husband's bits when he's, say, washing the dishes naked and doesn't know you have the camera, but unsolicitied penis pictures are just tacky. I mean, ICK! My fault, I suppose for thinking it may be someone I know.
On this note, penises are not particularly photogenic. I mean, of all the "forbidden" parts, it's the most funny looking. Not that vaginas are much better, but they can look like flowers and stuff. According to Georgia O'Keefe.
I laughed at the inappropriate penis pics. What can I say? Genitals make me laugh.